At first, I really
enjoyed Facebook. My friends posted the kind of things you would want to know.
Kid events, past time pictures, vacation news, life changes and so on. People I
used to interact with on a daily basis were suddenly right there again. I enjoyed
it.
As time went by and
the number of friends increased, so did my time scanning my wall but that was
ok with me. I have never been a frequent poster although I did like to use the
like button, pardon the pun.
I don’t remember how
long it was before the bloom came off the rose and sourness entered the world
of Facebook. One day someone posted a political statement approving of in
supporting a position that was poison to me. I don't recall any post of a
political or religious nature that was in tune with my own sympathies prior to
that but perhaps that was I was not shocked by what I saw.
This particular
posting fired me up. I felt as though something special was lost. It did not
take long for me to become sensitive to all posts on controversial subjects
regardless of perspective or whether was in agreement or disagreement with
them. I just did not think FB was the forum for such things. I am not innocent
at all. I admit sometimes I got engaged in support of what I believe to be the
truth and I am sure others were just antagonized by me as I was in the first
place. That is the way our adversarial culture works. Meaningful dialogue that
can be had person to person is lost in the din of polarizing noise.
The thing about all
this is that getting riled up and throwing hand grenades of my own is not good
for me. Being angry and frustrated is a direct threat to my health and my
sobriety. I wish I was better at keeping an open mind or being able to let
others say their piece without either taking it personally or, worse yet,
engaging in a way that betrays my desire to maintain composure but it seems that over time I lose my balance
and off we go. When I find myself searching for things beyond what I commonly
encounter that either supports my beliefs or further enrage me, it is time to
make a change.
Consider this. I
have not come across anything on Facebook that has impacted my beliefs in any
way expect that I may have become more entrenched and resolute than before. I
have no doubt I have not any impact on anyone else so the net result calls to
mind Act 5, Scene 5 of Macbeth:
"(Life) is a
a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."
The question is how
long I will continue to play the idiot's game, trading sword swings against
those with whom I should try to find commonality instead of wedging us further
and further apart. I fear nothing of value will come of all this and I inevitably
will annihilate my serenity.
What remains is for
me to step away and let the tempest in my psyche boil away into spent
hollowness so the calm where serenity grows will flourish. As is often said in
a 12 step program I admire, half measures availed us nothing.
Beannachtach agus síocháin Blessings and peace.
June 7, 2019 - Postscript: I am still off Facebook. I have no plans to ever return.
