Angels, Dreams and Fatherhood
Lessons to learn from St. Joseph
Joseph is often referred to as at the “greatest saint.” We
should ask how he earned that honor. He was not a great missionary like St.
Paul or a great evangelist like St. Peter. He was not learned or educated so he
was not the source of theological wisdom like St. Augustine. He was, instead, a
simple, ordinary, hard working man who loved his family and cared for the
infant Jesus as if Jesus was his biological son. His ordinariness, however, only extended so
far. Rather than turn his back on Mary when he learned of her pregnancy, he
stepped up to be a husband to Mary and a father to the most important human
ever born, a child who would grow up to the world around him upside down. If word
Joseph was not the father of Mary’s child were to be revealed not only was Mary
at risk for violating of the moral code of the time, Joseph’s standing in the
community, and maybe his life, was endangered as well.
The greatness of Joseph does not come from the many things
he was not but, rather, from what he was that was – a very humble man. There is
a great deal we can learn from Joseph about being simple, ordinary and human
fathers ourselves. Today we will explore some of the ways we can seek to be
more like Joseph
To set the stage we should begin by considering how we
individually define fatherhood for ourselves individually. Join me in some
reflections on the issue by asking some questions of ourselves.
What were your first thoughts about fatherhood, thoughts
that might have first revealed to you, perhaps even as far back as when you
were a child yourself?
I remember wondering if I would ever become a father. My own
father died suddenly when I was 11 so closest role models I had as I entered
young adulthood were my uncles and grandfathers. All were great man who loved
me and guided me well but they were not my father. At the end of the day they
always when back to their home at night.
We are never certain about our destiny as we to try look
into the opaqueness of dimly light future. I am sure I was not the only one of
us to question the future. Would I marry? Would I have children? Would I have
boys or girls? How many children would my as yet unknown wife and I have
together? What would our children be like?
My journey to fatherhood was not easy. While I met my wife while
we still in our teens and quickly formed a life bond, having children proved to
be difficult, frustrating and filled with tragedy and even hopelessness. In the
end, however, we became parents and I became a father. That was just the
beginning of it for me just as it was for each of us who proudly call ourselves
fathers. You see once become a father, you will be a father for all of the rest
of your days both here on earth and beyond the pale in heaven. What is done
cannot be undone. For that I am grateful to God.
Just as Joseph dreamed, I dreamed about fatherhood; but not
just while I was asleep but while I was awake. Like many, I wanted to be a
father in ways I can’t even begin to explain. To imagine a future life while awake
is called a day dream but it still a dream like any other. Clarity and
direction can come from both dreams and day dreams but only if we listen for
the soft voice of the Lord who wants to be part of our life and guide our feet
on to a path of light.
Even now at time when my sons have grown into their twenties,
my dreams and day dreams continue on as before. Will they marry? Will they have
children? All of the same questions I had for myself I now have for them. I
believe this also true for all of us. This shared connection is part of our
humanity. God wired us that way.
What about our dreams and day dreams? How do they compare to
the dreams of Joseph? Do our dreams inspire us to be selfless like Joseph or
are we self centered about what we want for our children without considering
what God’s will might be for them?
It is time to explore the lessons we can learn from Joseph.
Maybe we can change our dreams.
