Week 1 - Day 4 - Saturday Matthew 6 25-34

Lillies of the Field

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat [or drink], or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they?  Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your life span? Why are you anxious about clothes? Learn from the way the wild flowers grow. They do not work or spin. But I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was clothed like one of them. If God so clothes the grass of the field, which grows today and is thrown into the oven tomorrow, will he not much more provide for you, O you of little faith? So do not worry and say, ‘What are we to eat?’ or ‘What are we to drink?’ or ‘What are we to wear?’ All these things the pagans seek. Your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom [of God] and his righteousness, and all these things will be given you besides. Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself. Sufficient for a day is its own evil.

I avoided this gospel passage when it was first presented as a focal point because it makes me uncomfortable. This morning I have come to accept that in the spiritual development world, it is imperative to investigate what causes pause and to not always settle in with what causes comfort. Reluctantly I settle in to look more closely at why I would choose to bypass this passage.

The simple answer is Jesus asks us to not worry about mundane things like food and clothing. Indeed, why should I worry about them? There has never been a time when I lacked for either. I have never known true hunger or lacked what I needed to be comfortable and appropriately distressed. These things have always been available, always. 

My anxiety about food, clothing or any other needed items ranging from bandages to phone charging cords is that I have to do without them or not had enough of the right kind of things. There have been times when I did not bring enough food or ran out of something I wanted or thought I needed. I failed to bring enough water to drink or needed a raincoat and did not have one. That causes a worrier like me to worry. At times, the worry consumes me. 

There was a time a few years ago when I was obsessed with what are called bug-out bags, backpacks and duffle bags filled with essential items like flashlights, matches, whistles, space blankets and note pads and pencils. Why? Because I lived in an area prone to earthquakes and there had recently been a small quake? Did I gather up enough weapons and ammo to defend us for days? From what did we need defending? I finally found a way to flip on a light switch and expose that whole fiasco for what it truly was - irrational. Still, I have little kits of emergency items buried away in my vehicles, luggage and sports packs. The curious, and sobering, realization is I have never used any of them, at least not that I can recall right now. Still, I worry. 

I am a source of amusement for my friends and companions. They laugh at my preparation. They laugh until they need a bandage or extra shirt but by the time the next adventure comes around, they will have forgotten but I will not. I might bring two extra coats or cans of tuna. Just in case. 

There is one phrase that convicts me, "O you of little faith." I have to ask myself if the accusation is true. After consideration, my answer is yes, in part, but also no, in part. As I sit and watch the sun slide up over the hills to shine through broken clouds, I can state with absolute certainty there is a God. I know he exists. I know of us his love even if I can't capture the dimensions of it. I know that because of my knowledge I have hope of joining the resurrected. I know those whom I love who also know God will also have hope they will join me and those who have gone before. I know these things. 

What I don’t know is whether I will bring the right combination of clothes on our trip today. I don't know if I am going to run out of peaches, a fruit I am currently obsessed with eating. I don't if our tomatoes will start ripening so we can enjoy them before the fall freeze comes. These things cause me to hesitate, to not relax, and just look around me to enjoy the solitude. 

My Benedictine spirituality guides me. It causes me to take stock of how things are and to focus on what is needed at any given moment. I am shown examples of how to tend the garden, seek food, and dress appropriately that are very simple, very focused and all done for his glory and gratitude for what we are not only able to receive but what we accomplish with his help. 

As the temperatures warm this morning multitude of birds will visit my feeders. They will gorge themselves with foods to help them be strong enough to migrate or simply remain here through the lean times to come. They don't seem to worry about it. They come to visit and if the feeders have the foods they eat, they will hang around and feed. If the feeders are empty they, simply search elsewhere. Of course, they will demand that I do my job. Yesterday a flicker landed on the table where I was writing and yacked at me until refilled the feeders including his favorite suet.  

The challenge for me today is to simplify what I want to just what I truly need and let the rest go. It is about becoming less, needing less, wanting less, and finding joy in the minimal. 

Good luck with that I say to myself. I promise to try and to have faith and trust in trivial things and not just matters of ultimate concern.